Mirror: “Crisis on Infinite Earths?”
Dorkpool: Kinda. But I’m talking about something in particular.
Mirror: Elaborate then.
Dorkpool: Why does “Sonic.exe” have a fan base and spin-offs?
Mirror: I ask the same of Jeff the Killer and Twilight. Honestly, I just think that some people like awful things for some reason.
Dorkpool: Makes sense.
Dorkpool: Anyway, we’re Riffing a spin-off of “Sonic.exe” called “The Prequel of Sonic.exe.”
Mirror: You know I’m not one of those people I was talking about, right?
Dorkpool: Of course. But we’re still Riffing it.
Mirror: Damn it.
Dorkpool: Let’s play a stupid game and Riff this bitch.
So. You are wondering how did All of this Happen… Am i rite?
Dorkpool: Not really, no. But good guess.
This all started when Kyle had was just playing his sonic the hedgehog game which he found in his closet. As soon as he wen’t on to play the game on the Green Hill Zone level, he first notices that sonic isn’t acting like his old self like how he remembered.
Mirror: (Narrator): For some reason, Sonic was yodeling.
Sonic was crouching, Just trying to stand as if he went into a Critical Battle. Kyle then see’s that sonic had collapse to the floor which has immediately went into a cut scene where it show’s the death of sonic and his friend’s are just standing over his corpse laughing at him as it was the last thing he see’s.
Dorkpool: I see’s.
Kyle in shock because this is the First time he has seen this in the game. He look’s on sonic as he see’s the beaten and a message appear’s on the screen “~please….h..h…help….me.…~”. Kyle in fright and he starts to kill Anything and Everything that laughed at him, and He soon awakes to Realize that what he Killed in his Nightmare is What he Killed in Reality!
Mirror: (Narrator): As it turns out, during his nightmare he killed Donald Trump. So it was no big loss.
Kyle was in horror when he saw what sonic has done. Sonic was covered in blood of the innocent’s he slaughtered. Sonic was overwhelmed by the stress and soon the blood was now attached to his fur, and his eyes Blood-Shot Red due to his tears. Sonic soon cursed and raged against his actions which made him go somewhat insane. The more rage he had, the more Darker his surrounding got.
Dorkpool: Don’t make him angry. You won’t be able to see the surroundings when he’s angry.
He shouted as much as he could until he seem himself. He saw a Dark Twisted Version of himself which whispered from afar, but sonic didn’t hear a word until a scream of “Let’s Play Hide and Seek!” Came from behind his Ear. Sonic was then Alone in the Darkness with only the words “I….Am…..GOD!!!!!!!”
Mirror: And I’m an atheist.
Kyle Tried to Shut Off the his T.V hoping that he won’t see sonic suffer anymore than what he should have.
Dorkpool: (Narrator): Kyle figured Sonic had to suffer a little bit for Sonic ’06.
He soon unplugged his. T.V, but them sonic had changed.
Mirror: Well would ya lookie here. It looks like that them there Sonic went right ahead and changed.
The screen which showed sonic alone In the darkness was replaced with the Dark-Twisted Sonic. His eye sockets were nothing but pure black, and his eyes were just Filled with the Color Blood Red.
Dorkpool: As opposed to being filled with the color Stoplight Crimson.
“Hello Kyle, Would you like to play Hide and Seek with Me?” Appeared on the screen. Kyle opened his gaming system, and pulled out the disk, but as soon as he held it, he felt a weird presence around him.
Mirror: (Narrator): The presence of bad writing.
Dorkpool: No, he’s felt that presence throughout the entire story.
The Sonic the Hedgehog disk was Completely missing its art, and the words that was placed was soon turned into: sonic.exe. Kyle frightened about what happened to sonic was soon a twisted memory fragment in his mind. “Oh, You Don’t Wanna Play With Me?” The Demonic Voice Screeched from the T.V.
Dorkpool: (Kyle): Not really, no.
Kyle ran around his home looking for Anything to destroy the disk. But all what Kyle found In front of him that was in the way of some tools he glances from far is a Sonic Plushy covered with blood just like Sonic from the dreadful video game. Kyle in a state of shock and fear couldn’t move. He knew that he Had too get rid of the game. But how as he asked himself.
Mirror: (Kyle): Hey, why don’t I just give it to my best friend, and let him deal with it?
Soon the Blood-Stained Sonic Plushy moved its head, and Stared rite into his Face with those Giant Fang like Teeth, and that Horrid Smile just staring at him… Mocking every exact move Kyle did. Kyle couldn’t do anything. “You Hide WhileI I Seek!” Kyle still in fear couldn’t do a thing but to try and dash away from the plushy. “I FOUND YOU!” As the plushy yelled while appearing in thin air. “You Are Boring Me Kyle!!!”.
Dorkpool: You are annoying me, story.
Kyle who has nothing left but the only thought he had was to pass away the game to someone else. If he did that, then Maybe the nightmare would be over as he only thought. “MY TURN!!!” The plush said in that Evil Demonic voice. Kyle soon yoinked
Mirror: Wait, yoinked?
Mirror: Who the hell uses yoinked in a story?
Dorkpool: The same person who uses see’s.
his sonic disk, and stuffed it into an package. He wrote as fast as he could, then raced to his mailbox and jammed it in. “WHERE ARE YOU!!!?” The plush asked Kyle whom would hope he’s plan had worked. But immediately, the plush has given up of staying hidden and off to finish his Victim.
Dorkpool: (Mortal Kombat Announcer Voice): FINISH HIM.
“GAME-OVER KYLE!!!”. Kyle knew that he was done for. As he felt the Rotted presence In the air surrounding him, he prayed and Hoped that his plan would work, but he was soon stroked with a fatal blow from the plush.
Dorkpool: (Mortal Kombat Announcer Voice): FATALITY.
“Ready For Round 2?” The Plush asked to the last remains of Kyle.
Mirror: (Narrator): The plush waited for a minute, then wondered why it was asking a corpse a question.
Dorkpool: It sucks, but it’s somehow not as bad as “Sonic.exe Round 2.”
Mirror: The spelling and grammar are awful, and hinder understanding of the story. The characters aren’t developed. The narrative is rather confusing, but that’s mostly due to not being able to understand what’s going on because of the terrible spelling and grammar. This story is supposed to fill in what happened before “Sonic.exe” that caused Kyle to send the disk to the moron from “Sonic.exe” whose name I don’t remember.
Dorkpool: If it makes you feel better, I don’t remember either. Then again, I was drinking a lot during that Riff, so there’s not much I remember from it.
Mirror: Anyway, this still doesn’t really explain that. How was Kyle able to mail that to whatshisface? Did the plush let him go to a post office and mail it? Please explain, story.
Dorkpool: There are good things though. Unlike the original “Sonic.exe,” this story doesn’t use the phrase “hyper-realistic” (or maybe it did, and I was unable to understand it since the writing was so bad), which is always a good thing. Also, while this story didn’t explain how the game got to Iforgothisname, it did explain why. We know exactly why the game was sent away: Kyle was somehow unable to destroy it because there were nothing he could use to destroy it (I think. Once again, the terrible spelling and grammar makes it hard to understand), and he was being screwed with by furries from hell. And this story is short, something I’m rather happy about, since I don’t think anyone could bear a longer version of this story. However, this still sucks. A lot. At least this writer doesn’t seem to think that this story is good, unlike the person who wrote the “Sonic.exe” stories. (No, seriously, the guy – JC-the-hyena – seems to think that his story is good and well loved, and those who hate it must also hate furries and dislike good writing. I shit you not) But that’s what we think. What do you guys think? Was the story good? Was the Riff good? Do you wish we’d get chased by some demonic plush doll? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.