Dorkpool: Ok, good, it doesn’t look like Mirror’s around. The story I plan to Riff today is based off of RWBY, a rather great YouTube series from Rooster Teeth. We’re both fans, but Mirror’s a bit more…psychotically obsessed than I am. So that’s why I’ve locked him in his quarters. Alright, I need to make this quick, so let’s cosplay as Cr –
Mirror: -crashes in- I heard RWBY.
Dorkpool: How did you get in here?
Mirror: Walked.
Dorkpool: I locked you in your quarters.
Mirror: I had a sonic screwdriver in there. Unlocked the door.
Dorkpool: What about the robot guard I had outside the door?
Mirror: That was just Indo in what I assume to be a sexy Cylon costume. Honestly, I’m surprised that even exists.
Dorkpool: You and me both. Anyway, let’s cosplay as Creepypasta characters and Riff –
Mirror: Wait!
Dorkpool: What?
Mirror: Some readers might not know a thing about RWBY. They must be educated of the glory of it.
Dorkpool: Alright. Basically, it’s like Harry Potter, but –
Mirror: It’s not like Harry Potter! It’s its own unique and grand story.
Dorkpool: Let me put it this way: some friends are put into a group at a school for gifted individuals. There, they go on adventures somewhat unofficially sanctioned by the head of the school, and fight beings with somewhat racist genocidal plans. Tell me, what did I just summarize.
Mirror: Yeah, well…RWBY has more girls. And a catgirl. And badass weapons that are two weapons in one. And Nora.
Dorkpool: That’s true, and part of what helps make RWBY somewhat unique. I’m sure we could both go on about the series, but we’ve got a Riff to do. So, let’s cosplay as Creepypasta characters, and Riff this bitch!
START RIFF
"But Weiss he's a psycho murdering clown please!" Ruby begged her girlfriend to allow her to sleep in her bed,
Mirror: Wait, girlfriend?
Dorkpool: Yep.
Mirror: Did the author forget about Neptune?
Dorkpool: Canon only gets in the way of ships.
but Ruby's new tendency of jolting in the middle of the night had thrown Weiss of the bed far to many times for her to feel sympathy.
She simply looked up from her work and shook her head, the younger girl's eyes dropped in fear, and normally it was this look that would break Weiss's heart and completely do whatever Ruby required,
Dorkpool: (Narrator): But damn it, Weiss was not Ruby’s bitch!
but she hadn't slept soundly in a week, and she was not about to sacrifice another night of sleep just so they could repeat the process all over again. So she sighed as she shook her head again, this time though Ruby dropped to her knee's pleading for the heiress to allow her access to her bed, which was actually pretty good groveling.
Mirror: Ruby Rose: Slayer of Grimm. Eater of Cookies. Pretty Good Groveller.
"Please,Please,Please,Please,Please..." it went on and on for what seemed like a good twenty minutes. It kept going until Yang threw a pillow at her little sister knocking her over with a loud thud.
Yang got up now and marched over to her "For the love of anything holy, be quiet rubes. The lack of sleep your causing me split ends!
Dorkpool: It also seems to have caused you to say things that make no sense grammatically.
That and you've caused Blake to start sleeping outside." she stated quite angrily as her once luscious mane was now starting to become quite mangy as when Weiss couldn't sleep she didn't get to nor Blake who was now outside napping in a tree to make up for lost time.
"But Laughing Jack will get me. And she's outside what about Slender Man or Ticci Toby?! Doesn't Blake understand the dangers of these beings?"
Mirror: Somewhere, Roman Torchwick is shaking his head and asking himself, “This is the person who keeps beating me and screwing up my plans?”
Ruby asked fearfully only for Yang to groan in disbelief.
Finally realizing Ruby was absolutely serious she moved over to Weiss "Your coming with me princess." she stated grabbing the back of her coat, then started to drag her from the room much to her annoyance.
"Where are we going?" the Heiress asked as the door to there dorm closed behind them.
Dorkpool: (Yang): To see the Wizard, the wonderful Wizard of Oz.
"Ren. I have an idea on how to fix our problems tonight." she stated simply knocking on team JNPR'S room. Which was quickly answered by a certain redhead.
Mirror: Mary Jane?
Pyrrha looked to Yang and then Weiss was still sort of being dragged "Ah what's going on?" she asked utterly confused to the nature of this visit "And why are you dragging Weiss?"
Dorkpool: (Yang): Because she wasn’t a big fan of being walked on the leash.
which was a question thought she should have asked first.
"Not important is Ren here?" Yang asked quickly.
"Yes?"
Mirror: (Pyrrha): Though he and Nora are doing the do.
Dorkpool: Aren’t they just close friends in the show?
Mirror: LET ME HAVE MY SHIP, GOD DAMN IT!
Pyrrha nodded cautiously in response "Why do you need him?"
"I need him to make a few costumes, and he made Nora's sloth costume right?"
Dorkpool: I’m honestly curious as to why he made her a sloth costume.
Mirror: Because Nora.
Dorkpool: Good point.
she inquired earning a nod from the amazon. "Good."
"Your time is up!" at the noise Ruby bolted from her bed surveying the room. She was scared for a moment, but quickly chalked it up to a nightmare
Mirror: The latter is the same response everyone has to reading “Clockwork: Your Time Is Up.”
as she turned to her partner deciding it be best to maybe sleep with her tonight. Being quiet she gently shook Weiss trying to rouse her from her sleep, but was surprised when she wouldn't stir, usually she'd be mad at this point.
Dorkpool: And when Weiss gets mad, she becomes the Incredible Bitchy Brat.
"Weiss.." she shook the heiress as she whispered quietly. "Hey Weiss?" worried she shook her harder. "Weiss get up now!" scared, she rolled her over only to scream. In her chest was a knife, her eyes shut in an eternal slumber, but her mouth was opened in a sickened scream which brought tears to Ruby's eyes as she felt sick.
She heard steps turning her head only to see a slender girl, one of her eyes had been replaced by a clock, her hands were bloody, and the look her face was one of absolute satisfaction.
Mirror: The Rolling Stones were wrong. One can get satisfaction.
"Your time is up." she stated advancing with a knife raised now, her new target before her, but she didn't get far before Ruby bolted past her, screams echoing around the room and suddenly the hall as she pounding on Team JNPR's room.
"Jaune!" she screamed for their leader as the door slowly opened revealing a hooded teen with some weird mask and in each hand a bloody hatchet making Ruby pale in horror.
Dorkpool: People at Beacon take cosplay way too seriously.
Her mind went blank as she darted down the hall tears streamed from her eyes as she creamed for help, for anyone to come to her aid. But that's when she came face to face with him.
His skin was a plastery white, his hair black and greasy, her appeared as though he was a rag doll in his movements.
Mirror: Charlie Sheen?
His cloths were black and white devoid of almost all color, and from between his sharpened teeth came a horrid cackle as he slowly made his way towards her, his laughter getting louder as she shrank, tears still streamed from her eyes, but her blood was frozen.
Dorkpool: (Narrator): Her frozen blood dropped her body temperature rather quickly, and killed her. The end.
"All around the Mulberry Bush, the monkey chased the weasel." he began his song, but hearing this snapped her back to her senses, and drawing up every bit of her aura that she could she ran as fast as possible, she ran out the door of the dorms, and kept running deciding she would never stop until she got home, her screams echoed across Vale.
Seeing her run from the dorms Yang turned towards Blake giving her a big hug "Nice job my little Blakey.. I mean Clockwork."
Mirror: (Yang): We just gave my little sister permanent psychological scars. High five!
"Please let go of me Yang, this clock is starting to push against me." she stated devoid of emotion as usual while Weiss got up from her bed.
She looked a little ticked removing the fake knife from her nightgown "At you don't have to clean fake blood from your cloths. This is expensive Yang!" Weiss added bitterly.
Both: You’re rich!
"Yeah but it was so worth it." Yang replied walking out the door to congratulate JNPR. She knocked oon the door only to come face to face with Ren in a badly made clown mask, with crayon colored on top labeled "Laughing Jack" which suddenly confused Yang while Jaune stepped next to him still fully dressed as Ticci Tobi with the other members of JNPR stepping behind them.
Dorkpool: (Narrator): Nora was dressed as a sloth.
Knowing the look he was getting Ren answered her "I used up all the spare fabric on the other's costumes, best I could do." he answered only for Jaune to suddenly input.
"Then why did I hear another scream?"
Mirror: (Yang): Because of the voices in your head.
Yang looked confused and was about to question when she noticed the rest of JNPR go pitch white, Pyrrha pointing behind her "What?" she asked playfully feeling a clawed hand on her shoulder, her blood started to grow cold at the words.
Dorkpool: (Person With Clawed Hand): Hi, do you have a moment to hear about our Lord and Savior Zalgo?
"The monkey though twas all in fun..." the voice grew sinister as Yang slowly turned her head to face this, her mind was racing on overload, her fears playing out in front of her.
"Pop goes the weasel..."
Mirror: (Yang): Damn it, I forgot to put my Satanic clown back in the Jack-In-The-Box.
END RIFF
Dorkpool: This story isn’t good, but it’s fun.
Mirror: This story is from Fanfiction.net, and it honestly does feel that way at some points. Ruby and Weiss dating, for example, is not canon, and just seems like a ship the author put in there because he agrees with it. Also, the characters both seem in character and out of character at the same time. Keep in mind, all of these characters are training to fight monsters. Hell, Ruby seemed so adept at fighting that she was sent to Beacon (the school the show takes place at, for non-RWBY fans) two years before she was supposed to. Because of all of that, her being so scared of Creepypasta characters, especially Clockwork, seems hard to believe. Plus, Yang scaring her sister like that just seems a bit mean spirited. And the spelling and grammar has some errors.
Dorkpool: There are good things about the story. The characters’ actions, while somewhat out of character, do seem like they would be logical under a certain set of circumstances. Also, the dialogue seems to fit the characters pretty well, and some of their actions seem to be lifted straight from the show (Yang dragging Weiss around is something I can easily imagine). This story is pretty flawed, but you can tell the author honestly had fun writing it, and cares about these characters. But that’s what we think. What do you guys think? Was the story good? Was the Riff good? Do you wish we’d be psychologically scarred by our friends? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.
Mirror: -crashes in- I heard RWBY.
Dorkpool: How did you get in here?
Mirror: Walked.
Dorkpool: I locked you in your quarters.
Mirror: I had a sonic screwdriver in there. Unlocked the door.
Dorkpool: What about the robot guard I had outside the door?
Mirror: That was just Indo in what I assume to be a sexy Cylon costume. Honestly, I’m surprised that even exists.
Dorkpool: You and me both. Anyway, let’s cosplay as Creepypasta characters and Riff –
Mirror: Wait!
Dorkpool: What?
Mirror: Some readers might not know a thing about RWBY. They must be educated of the glory of it.
Dorkpool: Alright. Basically, it’s like Harry Potter, but –
Mirror: It’s not like Harry Potter! It’s its own unique and grand story.
Dorkpool: Let me put it this way: some friends are put into a group at a school for gifted individuals. There, they go on adventures somewhat unofficially sanctioned by the head of the school, and fight beings with somewhat racist genocidal plans. Tell me, what did I just summarize.
Mirror: Yeah, well…RWBY has more girls. And a catgirl. And badass weapons that are two weapons in one. And Nora.
Dorkpool: That’s true, and part of what helps make RWBY somewhat unique. I’m sure we could both go on about the series, but we’ve got a Riff to do. So, let’s cosplay as Creepypasta characters, and Riff this bitch!
START RIFF
"But Weiss he's a psycho murdering clown please!" Ruby begged her girlfriend to allow her to sleep in her bed,
Mirror: Wait, girlfriend?
Dorkpool: Yep.
Mirror: Did the author forget about Neptune?
Dorkpool: Canon only gets in the way of ships.
but Ruby's new tendency of jolting in the middle of the night had thrown Weiss of the bed far to many times for her to feel sympathy.
She simply looked up from her work and shook her head, the younger girl's eyes dropped in fear, and normally it was this look that would break Weiss's heart and completely do whatever Ruby required,
Dorkpool: (Narrator): But damn it, Weiss was not Ruby’s bitch!
but she hadn't slept soundly in a week, and she was not about to sacrifice another night of sleep just so they could repeat the process all over again. So she sighed as she shook her head again, this time though Ruby dropped to her knee's pleading for the heiress to allow her access to her bed, which was actually pretty good groveling.
Mirror: Ruby Rose: Slayer of Grimm. Eater of Cookies. Pretty Good Groveller.
"Please,Please,Please,Please,Please..." it went on and on for what seemed like a good twenty minutes. It kept going until Yang threw a pillow at her little sister knocking her over with a loud thud.
Yang got up now and marched over to her "For the love of anything holy, be quiet rubes. The lack of sleep your causing me split ends!
Dorkpool: It also seems to have caused you to say things that make no sense grammatically.
That and you've caused Blake to start sleeping outside." she stated quite angrily as her once luscious mane was now starting to become quite mangy as when Weiss couldn't sleep she didn't get to nor Blake who was now outside napping in a tree to make up for lost time.
"But Laughing Jack will get me. And she's outside what about Slender Man or Ticci Toby?! Doesn't Blake understand the dangers of these beings?"
Mirror: Somewhere, Roman Torchwick is shaking his head and asking himself, “This is the person who keeps beating me and screwing up my plans?”
Ruby asked fearfully only for Yang to groan in disbelief.
Finally realizing Ruby was absolutely serious she moved over to Weiss "Your coming with me princess." she stated grabbing the back of her coat, then started to drag her from the room much to her annoyance.
"Where are we going?" the Heiress asked as the door to there dorm closed behind them.
Dorkpool: (Yang): To see the Wizard, the wonderful Wizard of Oz.
"Ren. I have an idea on how to fix our problems tonight." she stated simply knocking on team JNPR'S room. Which was quickly answered by a certain redhead.
Mirror: Mary Jane?
Pyrrha looked to Yang and then Weiss was still sort of being dragged "Ah what's going on?" she asked utterly confused to the nature of this visit "And why are you dragging Weiss?"
Dorkpool: (Yang): Because she wasn’t a big fan of being walked on the leash.
which was a question thought she should have asked first.
"Not important is Ren here?" Yang asked quickly.
"Yes?"
Mirror: (Pyrrha): Though he and Nora are doing the do.
Dorkpool: Aren’t they just close friends in the show?
Mirror: LET ME HAVE MY SHIP, GOD DAMN IT!
Pyrrha nodded cautiously in response "Why do you need him?"
"I need him to make a few costumes, and he made Nora's sloth costume right?"
Dorkpool: I’m honestly curious as to why he made her a sloth costume.
Mirror: Because Nora.
Dorkpool: Good point.
she inquired earning a nod from the amazon. "Good."
"Your time is up!" at the noise Ruby bolted from her bed surveying the room. She was scared for a moment, but quickly chalked it up to a nightmare
Mirror: The latter is the same response everyone has to reading “Clockwork: Your Time Is Up.”
as she turned to her partner deciding it be best to maybe sleep with her tonight. Being quiet she gently shook Weiss trying to rouse her from her sleep, but was surprised when she wouldn't stir, usually she'd be mad at this point.
Dorkpool: And when Weiss gets mad, she becomes the Incredible Bitchy Brat.
"Weiss.." she shook the heiress as she whispered quietly. "Hey Weiss?" worried she shook her harder. "Weiss get up now!" scared, she rolled her over only to scream. In her chest was a knife, her eyes shut in an eternal slumber, but her mouth was opened in a sickened scream which brought tears to Ruby's eyes as she felt sick.
She heard steps turning her head only to see a slender girl, one of her eyes had been replaced by a clock, her hands were bloody, and the look her face was one of absolute satisfaction.
Mirror: The Rolling Stones were wrong. One can get satisfaction.
"Your time is up." she stated advancing with a knife raised now, her new target before her, but she didn't get far before Ruby bolted past her, screams echoing around the room and suddenly the hall as she pounding on Team JNPR's room.
"Jaune!" she screamed for their leader as the door slowly opened revealing a hooded teen with some weird mask and in each hand a bloody hatchet making Ruby pale in horror.
Dorkpool: People at Beacon take cosplay way too seriously.
Her mind went blank as she darted down the hall tears streamed from her eyes as she creamed for help, for anyone to come to her aid. But that's when she came face to face with him.
His skin was a plastery white, his hair black and greasy, her appeared as though he was a rag doll in his movements.
Mirror: Charlie Sheen?
His cloths were black and white devoid of almost all color, and from between his sharpened teeth came a horrid cackle as he slowly made his way towards her, his laughter getting louder as she shrank, tears still streamed from her eyes, but her blood was frozen.
Dorkpool: (Narrator): Her frozen blood dropped her body temperature rather quickly, and killed her. The end.
"All around the Mulberry Bush, the monkey chased the weasel." he began his song, but hearing this snapped her back to her senses, and drawing up every bit of her aura that she could she ran as fast as possible, she ran out the door of the dorms, and kept running deciding she would never stop until she got home, her screams echoed across Vale.
Seeing her run from the dorms Yang turned towards Blake giving her a big hug "Nice job my little Blakey.. I mean Clockwork."
Mirror: (Yang): We just gave my little sister permanent psychological scars. High five!
"Please let go of me Yang, this clock is starting to push against me." she stated devoid of emotion as usual while Weiss got up from her bed.
She looked a little ticked removing the fake knife from her nightgown "At you don't have to clean fake blood from your cloths. This is expensive Yang!" Weiss added bitterly.
Both: You’re rich!
"Yeah but it was so worth it." Yang replied walking out the door to congratulate JNPR. She knocked oon the door only to come face to face with Ren in a badly made clown mask, with crayon colored on top labeled "Laughing Jack" which suddenly confused Yang while Jaune stepped next to him still fully dressed as Ticci Tobi with the other members of JNPR stepping behind them.
Dorkpool: (Narrator): Nora was dressed as a sloth.
Knowing the look he was getting Ren answered her "I used up all the spare fabric on the other's costumes, best I could do." he answered only for Jaune to suddenly input.
"Then why did I hear another scream?"
Mirror: (Yang): Because of the voices in your head.
Yang looked confused and was about to question when she noticed the rest of JNPR go pitch white, Pyrrha pointing behind her "What?" she asked playfully feeling a clawed hand on her shoulder, her blood started to grow cold at the words.
Dorkpool: (Person With Clawed Hand): Hi, do you have a moment to hear about our Lord and Savior Zalgo?
"The monkey though twas all in fun..." the voice grew sinister as Yang slowly turned her head to face this, her mind was racing on overload, her fears playing out in front of her.
"Pop goes the weasel..."
Mirror: (Yang): Damn it, I forgot to put my Satanic clown back in the Jack-In-The-Box.
END RIFF
Dorkpool: This story isn’t good, but it’s fun.
Mirror: This story is from Fanfiction.net, and it honestly does feel that way at some points. Ruby and Weiss dating, for example, is not canon, and just seems like a ship the author put in there because he agrees with it. Also, the characters both seem in character and out of character at the same time. Keep in mind, all of these characters are training to fight monsters. Hell, Ruby seemed so adept at fighting that she was sent to Beacon (the school the show takes place at, for non-RWBY fans) two years before she was supposed to. Because of all of that, her being so scared of Creepypasta characters, especially Clockwork, seems hard to believe. Plus, Yang scaring her sister like that just seems a bit mean spirited. And the spelling and grammar has some errors.
Dorkpool: There are good things about the story. The characters’ actions, while somewhat out of character, do seem like they would be logical under a certain set of circumstances. Also, the dialogue seems to fit the characters pretty well, and some of their actions seem to be lifted straight from the show (Yang dragging Weiss around is something I can easily imagine). This story is pretty flawed, but you can tell the author honestly had fun writing it, and cares about these characters. But that’s what we think. What do you guys think? Was the story good? Was the Riff good? Do you wish we’d be psychologically scarred by our friends? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.