There was a time when my least favorite word was a time betwixt "YOLO" and "swag". That was before I was introduced to my new least favorite word: "hyper-realistic". It's a word that's pretty prevalent in bad Creepypasta stories trying to be like "Squidward's Suicide" or "Sonic.exe", and a word I've grown to despise. Why do I bring this up? Because I Riffing a story that's trying to be the Mario equivalent of "Sonic.exe". This story manages to be worse than "Sonic.exe" though. Don't believe me? Well, let's bleed hyper-realistic blood, and Riff this bitch!
I love the wii u
(Narrator): The Wii U is love, the Wii U is life.
there was not that many games but its still cool. 1 game new super mario bros u
New Super Mario Bros U with Kung-Fu grip!
was my favorite wii u game. One day i went to gamestop to get me a copy of the game.The clerk told me to take it for free.
That’s totally not suspicious at all.
Once i got home i put the copy of new super mario bros u in my wii u.When started the game up something was odd. The title was covered in hyper realistic blood
I don’t think the English language, or any language for that matter, has the right words to express my anger and displeasure.
and insted of saying press a it said your about to die.
On the one hand, I’m mildly annoyed because that’s the wrong "your." On the other hand, I’m happy that the narrator is going to die.
I ingnored it and went to the file selction screen.File 1 said you are and file 2 said about to and file 3 said die. Saying you are about to die a secend time.I got a little scared but i moved on.
You’re the reason we have "WARNING: HOT" on coffee cups, aren’t you?
There was no cutsene it just straight to the world map.I went to the first level and instead of saying acorn plains way.It said in all caps YOU BETTER RUN! Once i started the level there was dead enemies everywere.Mario had a sick twisted smile and the ground was covered in hyper realistic blood.
STOP. USING. THAT. WORD.
But i continued the game.After i watched the ending and noticed something behind me.
(Narrator): It was Shia LeBouf!
It was mario standing right near me and shouted.YOU ARE GOING TO DIE!He ran to the kitchen drawer and grabed a knive and stabed me.
Please be dead please be dead please be dead…
I woke up in the hospital
Damn it.
and found stitches on my stomach i went home earlier that day and destroyed the disc from the underworld.And every time i go to bed at night mario and his creepy smile at the end of my bed.
Watching you sleep turns Mario on, it seems.
END RIFF
This story sucks. A lot. It has terrible spelling and grammar, a plot taken from "Sonic.exe", and, worst of all, the use of the word "hyper-realistic".
Now, if this story were a parody, I wouldn't hate it as much. Sure, it'd suck, but not as much because it's intentionally trying to be bad. (By the way, if you're looking for a half-way decent parody of "Sonic.exe", check out "Bob.exe". It's actually kind of funny) However, I found this on the Creepypasta Land Wiki, so I'm pretty sure that it's supposed to be serious. So, yeah, it sucks so very, very much.
So, what do you guys think? Was the story good? Was the Riff good? Do you wish I'd bleed hyper-realistic blood? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.
I love the wii u
(Narrator): The Wii U is love, the Wii U is life.
there was not that many games but its still cool. 1 game new super mario bros u
New Super Mario Bros U with Kung-Fu grip!
was my favorite wii u game. One day i went to gamestop to get me a copy of the game.The clerk told me to take it for free.
That’s totally not suspicious at all.
Once i got home i put the copy of new super mario bros u in my wii u.When started the game up something was odd. The title was covered in hyper realistic blood
I don’t think the English language, or any language for that matter, has the right words to express my anger and displeasure.
and insted of saying press a it said your about to die.
On the one hand, I’m mildly annoyed because that’s the wrong "your." On the other hand, I’m happy that the narrator is going to die.
I ingnored it and went to the file selction screen.File 1 said you are and file 2 said about to and file 3 said die. Saying you are about to die a secend time.I got a little scared but i moved on.
You’re the reason we have "WARNING: HOT" on coffee cups, aren’t you?
There was no cutsene it just straight to the world map.I went to the first level and instead of saying acorn plains way.It said in all caps YOU BETTER RUN! Once i started the level there was dead enemies everywere.Mario had a sick twisted smile and the ground was covered in hyper realistic blood.
STOP. USING. THAT. WORD.
But i continued the game.After i watched the ending and noticed something behind me.
(Narrator): It was Shia LeBouf!
It was mario standing right near me and shouted.YOU ARE GOING TO DIE!He ran to the kitchen drawer and grabed a knive and stabed me.
Please be dead please be dead please be dead…
I woke up in the hospital
Damn it.
and found stitches on my stomach i went home earlier that day and destroyed the disc from the underworld.And every time i go to bed at night mario and his creepy smile at the end of my bed.
Watching you sleep turns Mario on, it seems.
END RIFF
This story sucks. A lot. It has terrible spelling and grammar, a plot taken from "Sonic.exe", and, worst of all, the use of the word "hyper-realistic".
Now, if this story were a parody, I wouldn't hate it as much. Sure, it'd suck, but not as much because it's intentionally trying to be bad. (By the way, if you're looking for a half-way decent parody of "Sonic.exe", check out "Bob.exe". It's actually kind of funny) However, I found this on the Creepypasta Land Wiki, so I'm pretty sure that it's supposed to be serious. So, yeah, it sucks so very, very much.
So, what do you guys think? Was the story good? Was the Riff good? Do you wish I'd bleed hyper-realistic blood? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.