Sylvia: Well, what’s it called?
Mirror: “Caroline the Killer.”
Sylvia: Oh. Jeff knockoff. Got it.
Mirror: Yep. So let’s use our epic hacksorz skillz and Riff this bitch.
Carolina was a genius and talented, so she got bumped up a year in high school, but quite and shy girl.
Mirror: -sighs- So it’s gonna be that kind of story.
Her parent's would beat and neglect her on a regular basics. She got bullied by the other students and teachers at school for the way she was.
Sylvia: (Teacher): Fuck you, Carolina, for being smart and making my class look good! Shame!
She didn't fit in no matter what she did, she was always on her own. After school she would go to the public library, to put of the inevitability of going home. She would eventually had to go home.
With no were else to go and the rest of, her family on the other side of the country. She was all alone in a world were no one cared, her parents hated her. Every one else though she was a freak.
Mirror: Yes, because being moved up a year in school is so freakish.
The only greeting she got was her mum when she got home. Was clean the fucking kitchen shouted at her. Then beaten if she didn't do it quick enough, or didn't do a good enough job. That was here week day routine, she wasn't allowed out on the weekends.
There was a boy she had a crush on at school, he was popular his name was Theo. Carolina wrote a love letter and drew a picture for him, but never had the courage to post it.
Sylvia: Well, let’s see. This is a story with “the Killer” in the title, and our main character is female, abused, and bullied. I bet you anything that picture involves blood and gore.
to him even though she lived, on the same street as him.
One night Carolina set her alarm for 2:30am. she managed to get up be for the alarm woke her parents. Like it would matter by the time they, went bed they were doped up.
A bomb going of wouldn't wake them, she still made sure she was quite just in case.
Mirror: (Narrator): By bombing her parents.
She wen through the back door as, her parents wouldn't notice it unlocked. If either of them got up.
She went down to Theo's house, and quietly posted the letter. As she didn't want to wake them, and get in to trouble. The beatings were bad enough, she didn't want to give, her parents a real reason to beat her even more.
She went back home locking the back door behind her. Then went back to sleep. as she had school the next day. The next day at school Carline over heard a, couple of girls saying that Theo had received her letter' and every one knew it was her.
Caroline knew they hadn't noticed, her or they would be picking on her. Lunch time came and Caroline was going to the school library, as she didn't get hungry round that time of day.
Sylvia: (Narrator): Her hunger for the souls of the innocent usually came around 3.
Plus there would be hardly any one there, so she didn't really picked on as much then.
A few minutes after she got there, and had settled at a table. At the back of the library. Theo walked up to her with a couple of girls and a lad, holding the letter she sent him. In front of her face he ripped it up, and said "Even if you killed the headmaster, It still wont be enough for you to be with"
Mirror: (Carolina): Oh, so I should kill the headmaster! Got it!
His friends laughed then one, girl said "You never had a chance, in the first place loser". Then they all laughed as they walked away.
Caroline sat in the library thinking, about what Theo had said to her. Maybe he was trying to tell me something, she thought to her self.
Sylvia: Yeah, that he doesn’t want to be with you.
She headed home early, picking up blonde hair dye on the way. When she got home her dad wasn't back yet, and her mum was asleep on the sofa.
Caroline got her dads hand gun and silencer, form his night stand. Them hide it in her room, she cleaned the kitchen and her other jobs. As she didn't want to be disturbed when she was dyeing her hair.
Once all was done Caroline put on her favorite outfit, and stayed in her room. surfing the internet
Mirror: (Narrator): Watching porn.
learning to hot wire vehicles, pick lock and other thing that might be useful, till Until her parents went bed.
She waited until it was past 11:30, to make sure her parents were out cold. Se went in to their room, and shot them point blank in the head. She went out the back door, and headed to the school.
To hack the computers to find out, the headmaster and a few others lived.When she was leaving the school she saw, three cop cars with the light and sirens on. go in the direction she had came from. Shrugging it of she continued with what she was doing.
Sylvia: You’re not very bright, are you?
She needed to kill the headmaster
Mirror: I was joking when I said that!
and get, revenge on some students and teachers. With the house's she needed to visit, being spaced out she needed transport. Looking around she saw a jag, on the same side as of the street of the school.
Perfect she thought as she climbed in, to hot wire it. At first her driving was jolty and stiff, but being a genius she soon got the hang of it.
Sylvia: Are you sure she’s a genius? Are you absolutely sure?
Starting with the house, furthest away form Theo's. One by one she killed every one, in their homes animal's were no exception.
When she was done she made her way to Theo's, broke in and tide up his little sister and parents, and dragged them one by one to Theo's room. With out waking him, once she had them in position facing him, she needed to wake him up.
"Theo, Theo" she said loud enough to wake, him but not the neighbours. "Mum is that you?, what's the matter?" he said half asleep. "Theo wake up, Iv killed them all for you" Caroline replied.
Mirror: Wait, is she Carolina or Caroline? Make up your mind, story!
He sat up and saw his family, tide up looking terrified.
"I killed for you Theo, just like you said." Caroline said with a smile. "When did I tell you to kill?" Theo asked unsure is he should have. "Don't you remember. In the library, at school. you said killing the headmaster, wont be enough so killed some him and others". Caroline told him all the people she had killed that night.
" I was trying to make a point that I will never be with you, but I know some one who likes you.
Sylvia: (Theo): I thought you were a genius! How did you not get that?
Mirror: (Carolina/Caroline): I don’t really understand sarcasm.
You just need to stop all this now." he yelled. Caroline stood there looking at him, with the gun pointed at his little sister. "You lied to me, you fucking lied" she shouted as she shot him in both knee's.
Mirror: (Theo): I used to be an idiot like you, then I took some bullets to the knees.
He screamed in pain, Caroline grabbed the back of his t-shirt.
She said "You lied to me, I was going to let you kill them" as she pulled him to the floor and positioning him. "But now you have to watch them die". She went down the line killing his whole family in front of him. Then shooting him in the head.
She was to preoccupied to hear the sirens get close, she ran down stairs but it was to late. The police kicked the door in, and surrounded her in seconds. She was sectioned, in a mental hospital for the criminally insane. For the murder of her parents and all the others.
3 months later Caroline escaped, her current were about is unknown.
Sylvia: Probably to the weird fictional limbo all the other Jeff knockoffs go after their stories end.
Mirror: This story sucks.
Sylvia: The grammar is awful, with the writer randomly inserting periods at bizarre times, making the story incredibly awkward to read. The main character seems to flip flop. On the one hand, she’s a genius. On the other hand, she can’t seem to understand that Theo wasn’t being literal about killing the headmaster. That being said, Theo could’ve said something else. Like, say, “You’re not my type.” Or maybe, “I wouldn’t go out with you if you were the last woman on earth.” Actually, scratch that last one. Knowing this character, she’d probably kill every other female on earth. Anyway, back to our main character. You know how I mentioned she seemed to flip flop? Well, even her name is like that. She’s called Carolina, then Caroline. Seriously, what is her name? Ugh. Whatever. She’s also not very well developed. We don’t know much about her, except that’s apparently a genius, yet kind of an idiot. She’s also abused and bullied, because god forbid we have a Jeff knockoff whose life doesn’t suck. And hell, the reason she’s bullied is kind of weak. So she’s a bit younger than her peers. Ok, that could lead to some bullying from a few students. But from teachers? Really? That’s stupid. If this girl is so smart, wouldn’t a teacher want her to do good? After all, if a student does well, then the teacher looks good. And if the teacher looks good, that means more money for the teacher. Just saying. And her parents are assholes to her because they’re drug addicts? What? Also, if Carolina/Caroline was doing all these chores and shit around the house, how does she have time to do homework? I’m assuming she’s been doing this for years. Wouldn’t her grades suffer? And, if so, how did she skip a grade? Just saying. Outside of the logical inconsistencies and flat characters, the plot reads like a standard Jeff Formula story: main character is bullied/abused, main character goes nuts, gets some kind of skills (in this case, hacksorz skillz and the ability to hotwire. I know, she researched it, but she never practiced beforehand or anything, so I’m calling bullshit), and goes on murder spree. And, honestly, this is somehow done in an even more forced and idiotic way, since the reasons she becomes a serial killer is because some guy said, offhand, that he wouldn’t fuck her even if she killed the headmaster. That is lazy and stupid.
Mirror: There are some good things. The story isn’t too long, so it doesn’t drag. The spelling’s not too bad. And, in a way, it’s so stupid and bad that in can be enjoyed for how bad it is. Unless that’s not your thing. In which case, it sucks. But that’s what we think. What do you guys think? Was the story good? Was the Riff good? Do you wish we’d be killed by an idiotic genius? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.