Mirror: I’m well aware of that.
Dorkpool: So am I, especially since we’re getting into a story arc involving the guy.
Mirror: Stop with the…ugh…anyway, the story we’re Riffing.
Dorkpool: Right! The story! This one is called “Children of a Killer”, and - spoiler alert – it’s about the children of Jeff the Killer.
Mirror: Someone would want to have his kids?
Dorkpool: Have you seen his fangirls?
Mirror: Oh. Good point.
Dorkpool: Anyway, let’s be crappy parents, and Riff this bitch!
It was a bright sunny day at a local orphanage.
Dorkpool: (Narrator): Until the Fire Nation attacked.
As the sun shone through a window, two children woke up. Andrew and Cassie were twins, seven years old and lost both of their parents when they were infants. Andrew inherited his appearance from his dead uncle, and Cassie got hers from her mom.
Mirror: (Narrator): So, in case you were wondering, they are identical twins.
They went downstairs to play with their friends.
Later that day, they saw a figure that scared them.
Dorkpool: Shia LeBouf?
They only got to see his head, he had black hair, skin as white as snow, eyes bordered in black, and a smile carved into his face. They complained to a caretaker that they saw a scary figure.
Mirror: (Narrator): The caretaker asked if they had their medication today.
They described everything they saw.
"Oh my gosh..." Was all the caretaker said before saying they needed a nap.
Napping didn't help, that figure was in their dream. There was a woman chained to a table and a message they couldn't read on the wall. The figure was holding two infants, both crying, as he ran into his house. Not long after, the sound of someones footsteps could be heard from outside. Both children wanted to hold the babies, scared of what he would do.
Dorkpool: So twins can dream the same thing at the same time. Good to know.
The figure put them in a bedroom that an eleven year old would have. The last thing they heard was him speaking.
Mirror: (Figure): Shut up, or so help me I’ll turn around and you won’t go to Disney Land.
"Stop crying. Or the two of you can go to sleep." The figure said.
Both woke up to screaming. They ran and saw a boy who picked on them a lot, he had been gutted.
Dorkpool: Remember, kids: Don’t bully people, or you’ll die painfully.
His organs were everywhere. His eyes had been gouged out. Every child in the room either threw up or fainted. Andrew and Cassie were lead to another room by a caretaker.
"Kids, let me tell you something about your father. He isn't dead." She said.
"Then where is he?" Andrew asked.
Mirror: (Andrew): Ok, I kind of figured that out when you said he isn’t dead. Now can you answer my question?
But he is a bad person. You were found in his brothers room in his old house. We kept it a secret form the two of you." The caretaker said. Andrew and Cassie didn't do anything for the rest of the day.
The next day, they awoke to find themselves bound and gagged to the bed in their dream.
Dorkpool: Some dream of Jeannie, others dream of bondage.
They squirmed and tried to break free. It was hopeless. The figure came in, he was holding a knife covered in blood. They balled their eyes out.
Mirror: Ah, I love typos like this, because now I have an image of them just using their eyes as basketballs. Ball isn’t life, it’s eye.
"Sssshhh, it's OK children, Daddy's here." The figure said before ripping the gags off their mouths. Not caring about the knife, Cassie spit in his eye.
"Meanie. This hurts." Cassie said as she squirmed in her handcuffs.
"You know, you shouldn't spit on anyone.
Dorkpool: (Figure): They might be into that.
Even they are a meanie." He said as he put his knife in her mouth.
"LEAVE HER ALONE!" Andrew shouted.
"You're just like your mother. She didn't really like me."
Mirror: Well, to be honest, no one does.
He said. Andrew kicked him in the gut. He fell to the floor laughing.
"Who are you?" Andrew asked.
Dorkpool: (Figure): I…am your father.
"My name is Jeff. Call me Daddy," Jeff said.
Dorkpool: Told you. Also, Jeff is now officially a rapist. Goody goody gumdrops.
Both children screamed, "ssshh, just go to sleep." Jeff said. No, he didn't kill them, he just whacked them unconscious.
From then on, the children lived with Jeff.
Mirror: (Narrator): Jeff let them play video games and eat ice cream for dinner.
They would help him kill sometimes. But they didn't know it was bad until their own father nearly did it to them.
Mirror: It’s over.
Dorkpool: Are you sure? It feels like there’s more.
Mirror: No, it’s over.
Dorkpool: Oh. I’m not sad about that.
Dorkpool: Yeah, this story sucks.
Mirror: Quite a bit of it isn’t explained. How are the twins able to have the same dream? How did Jeff not get caught killing a kid? And why did he tie up his kids? Sorry, but I don’t think that’s a good first impression to make. And the ending is very abrupt, it almost feels like it wasn’t done, and the writer uploaded what he/she had so far. Maybe there was supposed to be a sequel, but so far, there hasn’t been one. And that would be fine…except the story was written almost two years ago. I think that’s enough time to do a second part. But I really shouldn’t be complaining. Also, the characters aren’t really developed, and the “parent taking back his/her kids after stalking them” is kind of cliché.
Dorkpool: However, there are a few good things. I’ve always been a fan of stories that take place in the future of an established universe, with the children of heroes and villains taking up their parents’ mantle. This story does do something with that, and it honestly isn’t badly written. When it comes to Jeff stories, I’ve seen worse. The spelling and grammar is pretty good, especially for a Jeff story. But there are quite a few flaws that really hurt the story. But that’s what we think. What do you guys think? Was the story good? Was the Riff good? Do you wish that we’d have the unfortunate luck to be related to Jeff the Killer? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.